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18 June 2015

Heading out today

At times like these, eloquence fails. Within the confines of my moth eaten brain I have begun this post on many occasions only to lose it once my mind’s eye dwells on the next experience of the day. Perhaps a cliché:
  • The days seemed long but the months were short.
Being American and a physician, I hit the ground here ready to teach and consult. And while I’m slightly embarrassed to admit this, it became clear that I was in what seemed like a time warp; new language, new pace to life, new colleagues. This of course has been the status quo for many a Fulbrighter. In fact it would seem I was one of the more fortunate as I had the opportunity to teach and mentor throughout my host country. Most of my Fulbright colleagues from this part of the world were consistently in one location. Once I was teaching, the weeks flew.

There is a saying in relief work that week 6 is where things seem to compress and condense into what will characterize your experience. This was certainly true with all my relief experiences in the past. Here the first six weeks were ones of relative inertia. I questioned if I was in the appropriate place, with the appropriate university and faculty. Naturally in a country where there are something like 120 ethnicities and nationalities there was miscommunication. In beautiful retrospect, even though my aggravation was in the red zone, the time spent with little to do was of value. I could gauge the rhythms, pace, cultures. So in random order:
  • First impressions are nothing more than first impressions.
And mine were superficial to be sure. What made this experience most enjoyable was that I had a chance to have many firsts. Most everyone is employed and while there is little adult levity on the streets, their children will bring it into the future. Kids are kids; laughing, teasing, squealing, flirting. They will free their parents from the sobriety inherited from Soviet times.
  • American health care is in chaos.
No news to those of us in the industry (notice I didn't say, “profession"). One gets a valuable opportunity to compare and contrast when abroad. The US spends twice as much on health care as the UK. Yet our quality of care ranks 37th in the world by most metrics while the UK regularly ranks in the top three. Here the US out spends KZ by more than twenty times. Kazakhstan, while it is still in relative infancy as a nation, is steadily improving and its health care should be in the first rank by another generation. With a single payer system there can be rampant corruption as exists here in KZ but access, prevention, and quality are more efficiently affected and sustained. 

As an American, when I disembark from the plane in Hawaii and am greeted by 80% obesity and 10% diabetes (worse in Hawaii), I will be at once glad to be back in what is familiar and will find myself shaking my head thinking, “If only…”
  • Personal space is not personal here
In a country where women routinely walk arm in arm, and men look straight ahead, there is a definite lack of Western culture-type courtesy. No door holding, queuing, deference. A door will open and people will pour through. Cars will engage in play where they will come as close to you as possible and at a very advanced rate of speed when you are crossing a street. Never mind that you are with the light or in a cross walk. To be fair, this is true in almost all places I have visited over the years, Vietnam being the best/worst example. I am not sure why I find it more annoying here. Age? God forbid.
  • Legacy
I set out on the Fulbright process simply thinking that it would be cool to do one, nothing else. As the process evolved it became clear that this would be a chance to actually define my legacy, my gift back to medicine if you will. In false modesty, I feel that I have done so. I have done some of my best work here. I learned from my experiences in Botswana, and other places that sustainability is both key and at best fleeting. Kazakhstan is on the threshold of what seems like a simple binary decision; spending resources on primary care specifically the most pragmatic of specialties, Family Medicine or on more sexy and easily attained equipment.

One of the most pressing problems is that Kazakhs live in what amounts to a benevolent dictatorship. Sure there are elections, the most recent being in April. But when Nazarbayev won with 98% of the vote one suspects the fix is in.
  • Heritage
There is an intense pride in the heritage of this country. Kazakhs have asked me what my country was like 500+ years ago whereupon I confess that most Americans have very little awareness of our indigenous heritage. Kazakhs celebrate it and are reminded of it daily. Yurts, horse meat, beshbarmak, kumyz, all of it is ancient and revered.
  • Farewell
This is my final day here and not only eloquence by simple vocabulary seems to fail. The Kazakhs are a kind and gentle people. They can be out spoken but things don’t escalate as they do in the US. I have never felt as safe as I do here, even in Botswana. There are thugs to be sure, but they aren’t armed with hand guns. I have never seen an animated conversation end in anger except yesterday when I was buying an item and a man was trying to return one for his money. The sales lady balked and he started to shout. In Louisville this could rapidly escalate into a confrontation dutifully documented by countless bystanders on their smart phones. Somehow, people here have the ability to ignore and feign naiveté. Communication is often through softly spoken conversation so much so that I strain to hear.  The social rhythm here, even after 10 months, seems undecipherable.

So I will miss Kazakhstan; her people, history, her emergence into young adulthood in the family of nations. I will return for more master classes as it is key that outside endorsement of Family Medicine continues. 

The US has all the physical features for which Kazakhstan is famous. I think those in the US are more grand. We have a “steppe”, huge mountain vistas, remote back country, canyons, and are bordered by four oceans (Alaska). Yet we lack patience and a kindness of being that is a treasured part of the fabric here. 

Many Kazakhs, and all of the medical students, I encountered want to visit or immigrate to the US. I do my best to disabuse them of this notion. There are more violent deaths in my home town per year than there are in the entire country here. People here, like in Botswana, get along because they must.  They have social tools to do so, tools so subtle that I become aware of them only on reflection.

So I leave tomorrow morning, early. As has become my habit I won’t look back. I will miss friends and colleagues. But those relationships will cool as they always do in my life when I re-enter the US. Painted with broad of strokes, Kazakhstan has been that kind person who you meet when you are new to the neighborhood. The one who invites you to share meals, family, and friends. Who seems to selflessly indulge your needs and guides you through early assimilation. And who seems to do so with little effort and with a kind and gentle lightness of being.

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